
Whether you’re writing a para or a novel, it’s easy to just slap in some words that may fit the situation, without necessarily even thinking about the motives behind what the character is saying. That is what this guide-ish bites into.
theprodigalsonoflamb desires a miracle
How amusing. She had been Fragment-hopping, looking for pieces of entertainment, when she found this rather dreary Fragment, too stuffed with mist. It intrigued her, and she’d taken to watching the residents for a while…but she hadn’t expected one of them to actually notice her, and see through her glamour. Should she say hello? Or continue watching?
Watching was probably for the best, after all, the cautious stare could have been just a fluke.

Pfft, what an understatement. Lambda had to be the complete opposite of discreet, in Necrofia’s opinion.
“Makes sense.” About half of Fia’s hostility disappeared then and there, for no good reason other than the witch was being decent with her. Not that Fia particularly enjoyed talking about herself, but for now she had control over what she could divulge.
“I’m not from here. My home is in Kemet, about 3000 years past of now. It’s mostly desert, though we have the Nile River running through. Back there I live with my significant other— the King of Thieves I follow— as well as his other followers, outside of the royal city. Here though, I’ve got a house in a nice neighborhood.” Got a house, meaning she killed off the inhabitants and managed to avoid law enforcement until now. ”I’ve got a Thief I report to, and sometimes his God. Nothing too interesting.”
A thief…and a god. So she definitely was part of Lambda’s GameBoard. “On the contrary, I’d say that having a God to report to is quite interesting. It’s very rare that the Gods decide to take physical form, on any Game Board.” She had to bite back a giggle. This was definitely an opportunity for information, but she kept quiet, for now, that is.
“All right, I’ll digest your information with a cup of tea,” she said, waving her hands and materializing a tea set. Words were best exchanged with tea, after all. “I hope you like chai. Now, in turn, we Witches don’t have any timeline, or attachments. We visit various worlds because we’re bored, and interfere with the Game taking place there by placing or acquiring Pieces on the Game Board. As to who is playing against who, I don’t think I need to point that out to you.”
“Ah, boredom is quite the opponent.” The archangel states with a grin. He, of course, knows the damn feeling for he’s been imprisoned in hell for over a millenium. “Tell me, Bernkastel, why did you choose to come to this dimension? There are millions of universes you could have gone to. Why choose this one out of all of them?”
“Surprisingly, not everything is so calculated. If I had to put meticulous thought into everywhere I went and everything I’d do, I’d have rotted away from boredom eons ago. Part of the fun of being a nomad, I suppose.” Part of the fun, when not playing a game, was rolling the dice and seeing what chance decided to hand her.
“It seems I found your Fragment as a result. I hope I’m not interrupting anything too important.” If she was, she’d be itching to steal a peek…but there was a time and place for that.

He wearily turned his eyes downwards to the felines, holding its gaze for quite sometime. The eerie feeling had immediately washed over him the second he’d perceived it’s behavior. But instead of dropping it instantly to the ground like he’d originally itched to do, he simply narrowed his eyes at it. The cat, it was reading him.
And then it was gone, jumping as flawlessly as a feline would to the top of his head. The man’s eyes widening slightly in genuine surprise, though he was generally unable to do anything about the situation.
For once, something had happened that he hadn’t necessarily predicted or had really even come close to inferring. He frowned is discomfort, before his brows furrowed at the woman opposite to him. A bit of a defensive bite held in his tone, “What’re you laughing at?”
The sight was truly a spectacle to behold. For one moment, her cat dove into mischief, and now it was taking a leisurely moment to rest atop her guest’s head. Such a playful sight was rare, not to mention amusing as a whole, would force her to laugh at the very least.
“No need for that tone,” she said, waving off his worries, “I’m sure you laugh as well when faced with comedy. And don’t worry, it doesn’t look as if my kitty would bite. As such, there’s no reason for you to be so hostile, either. It’s merely playing.” At least it wouldn’t bite while it was having fun. If the man did something careless, like accidentally agitate the cat…well, she wasn’t going to be responsible for any of his grievous injuries. Cats were very fickle, after all.
“Welcome,” The fallen archangel greeted the young witch. “I take it you came from another dimension, am I right?” He asked with a warm smile.
“Regardless of where you’re from, you’re welcome to be in this world as long as you don’t get in my way or do anything to upset me. My name is Lucifer, the king of hell and anything that goes against my father. Tell me, witch, what’s yours?”
Lucifer, how interesting. How different this man was from the loud, long-haired girl that she saw so often. Charming, how very charming.
“Mm, I suppose you could call it that.” Rather than a single dimension, the Sea was a place where all parallel universes could be visualized. But she wasn’t going to be picky upon her arrival.
Dipping into a small curtsey, the Witch gave Lucifer a customary bow. “I am Bernkastel, the Witch of Miracles. Pleased to make your acquaintance. Don’t worry, I’m not here to do anything as rude as disturb your home. I’m a mere refugee from boredom.”

Erika squealed quietly in delight to see her Master
“Ah! Master! I’m so happy to see you again” She said bowing in respect
Higanbana and Elizabeth looked over to the source of the squeal. The girl with the cat tail must be her master.
“Oh my, this must be Erika-san’s master. She quite the pretty one isn’t she. Ms. Frederika Bernkastel or perhaps Ms. Bernkastel. No no Lady Bernkastel.” The Yokai said looking over to the purple haired witch
“Most interesting. I sense an extrodinary amount of power coming from the young woman.” Elizabeth added.
When Beatrice saw the small cat run away from the appitizers in it’s mouth she almost thought of shooing it away. That is until she saw who it was for. She was now thankful she didn’t
“Oooh, Lady Bernkastel. So nice to see you here. I do hope everything is to your liking.” She greeted with a smile.
She’d recognize that high-pitched squeal anywhere. “Erika. It’s been a long time.” The other two women she didn’t quite recognize, but she had hardly enough time to memorize every face in the Sea.
“Tread carefully. There is nobody in this world qualified to use my first name.” She spoke those words with a dull smile, but nobody could deny the venom lurking behind them. In a flash, that poison was gone, and the Witch remained there, calm as ever, sipping idly at a cup of wine.
“The food is satisfactory, Beato,” she finally said, eyeing the Golden Witch, “I have no complaints.”

“Master, I had no idea you were coming. I would have prepared black plum tea.”
“There’s no need,” Bernkastel waved Erika off, recalling how appalling her Piece’s tea was. Blasphemy to the good name of tea, if she had anything to say about it.
“Still, I’m surprised you’ve made a name for yourself. Enjoying this little Fragment of yours?”



Bernkastel’s theme, “the executioner”
from Umineko no Naku Koro ni Chiru episode 7
the-fallen-lucifer desires a miracle
Oho. This was definitely something new, and something quite rare. She had been floating through the Sea by chance, and dove into the first Fragment that her hands touched. My, was she surprised.
The demons of the Witch’s world were often comical in appearance when they chose to not be at their lavish balls and parties in Hell, but this world was far different. The air was more raw, more tantalizing. How amusing; this could certainly cure her boredom for a while.

royalvizierofagrabah desires a miracle
Lambda had suggested she take a vacation; after all, her nerves had worn far thin after the various encounters with Featherine. Being able to freely travel was one of the perks of being a Voyager Witch, so she took to the Sea, and left herself drift until chance brought her to the nearest Fragment.
Everything was so bright and hot. Old Arabia, was it? Still, it was nice that she could move around with ease, not hindered by the dreadful anti-magic, even if her clothes obviously didn’t fit the fashions of the times.
Now, where could she go for entertainment?

[Right, I’ve got some free time before physics, so I’ll write up some starters right now! Keep on the lookout!]

catboxofmiracles replied to your post: catboxofmiracles replied to your post: Good, cuz…
[I DO AND I LOVE IT AND THIS JUST POPPED ON MY DASH AND I- this is a great idea :D][Oh goodness. Who would even be the Batter or Zacharie in this AU though—]
[Maybe Battler as the Batter (and then it turns out to be Black Battler all along?). As for Zacharie, we need a comical person who’s pretty neutral, so maybe Lambda? They both break the 4th wall pretty frequently, so…
Oishi would be such a good Enoch, just up his manipulative abilities a bit. What about Dedan and Japhet, though? We need someone REALLY ANGRY to be Dedan.
Bern as the Judge, what an opportunity for her to play the good guy for once.]